She's A Sabbatical Beauty: Kari Goetz


Kari Goetz
Kari, in her words: "in full makeup for the show 'Five Lesbians Eating a Quiche,' and post show in an old school favorite, Camellia Rose mask."
Tell us about you!
I'm a lifelong Floridian, with the exception of about five years that I spent in Los Angeles. I have a rabid love of my crazy state, its natural resources, and its ability to make headlines. My personal Florida stories are what you would expect growing up in a place where everything can kill you. When I was three, the “biting worms” I found in the backyard turned out to be a nest of juvenile pygmy rattlesnakes. That wasn't even my first nature related trip to the ER (I had previously eaten ixora berries). I spent my summers working at the Ding Darling Wildlife Refuge on Sanibel Island, where my primary job was identifying alligators that had become too accustomed to humans and had to be relocated. (“But Kari, how did you know?!?” Well, I'd sit in the back of a pickup truck at lunch near the gator habitat and if they came up and begged for my lunch like a big scaly dog, I shot them with a paintball gun and came back after lunch to tranquilize, tag, and relocate. I always gave them some of my sandwich as an apology for their upcoming lousy afternoon).
When I wasn't on a boat, fishing, tromping through swamps and mudflats, and otherwise exposing my skin to sun, I was in a dark theater or set. From the age of 8, when I entered into a modeling competition without telling my mother (and won), I have been auditioning and working in professional acting gigs. I have had my Screen Actors Guild card since 1987, and spent my first two years of college driving from the University of Florida in Gainesville, to the Disney Studios in Orlando, to film a television show four days a week and attend classes three days a week. It was grueling, but it paid for school and was a lot of fun.
After school, I went out to LA to keep trying the acting thing and fell into marketing while I was teaching and performing at Second City LA. My love of improv would carry me into grad school a decade later as I used it as praxis to develop leadership exercises that demonstrated organizational communication theories - but deep down I still just love a good dick-and-fart joke.
Somewhere in 2012, my best friend of 20 years and I fell in love (which is an amazing story in and of itself) and a year later got married, and six months later got pregnant, and now we have a 2-year-old boy that we believe might be the coolest person we know. Except for the whole “shitting his pants” thing.
All the rest is fairly straightforward. I rescue too many animals who take up a lot of space in our charming Florida bungalow. (Charming means that everything in it is either loose, broken, or otherwise compromised). I still get on stage about once a year, try to give back to the community, am the marketing director for the best airport in America (Tampa International - let me know if you're ever passing through), and travel for work more than I would like and travel for pleasure less than I would prefer.
What makes you angry?
Lately? Politics. Because I love politics. I love the insanity of election season. This year, the insanity is actually insane and it saddens, sickens, and scares the hell out of me. To quote Sydney Ellen Wade in The American President (one of my favorite movies and Sorkin is my favorite screenwriter), “How do you have patience for people who claim they love America, but clearly can't stand Americans?”
What makes you happy?
My kid. My partner. My furkids. A good script. Sand. Saltwater. Summer thunderstorms. MINI Coopers, the smell of old books, wit, mind blowing creativity, oysters, varied shoe selections in a size 5.
If you were an SB product, which product would you be, and why?
Dorian Gray. A good investment with guaranteed results, a charming homage to great literature, and a constant reminder that aging is inescapable but how you approach it is totally up to you and your actions.
What’s your desert island SB product, and why?
Why does it gotta be a desert island? I'm gonna go with deserted island, so I can assign it a tropical climate and determine my product on climate.
Wait, have I already over thought this question?
I'm going to go with Goat Milk and Rice Foaming Cleanser. It's practical while still being luxurious. And “Horchata Face” is my all time favorite SB term.
What is your favorite thing about your skin?
For all the sun exposure and abuse I put it through as a kid, it's resilient as hell, not overly sensitive, responsive to quality products, and looking pretty good for 41 years on the planet. Also, I never got stretch marks when I was pregnant, which has made me a fan of my skin in ways I never really quantified previously. Yay my skin!


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